so happy for many things

oh so pretty... i wan!! haha

so happy...

i m trying to keep my blog interesting with my prompt entries n i did it....

wahaha... ok, maybe not tt interesting to u

but at least its kinda updated as compared to my old hi5 1... hahaha

so happy...

i will look a lil more teenager-like with the clothes my bro bought for me...

yay.. finally possessing clothes tt're appealing to my age... wahahah

juz for ur info, many ppl hav been telling me to change my dress style coz its too childish..

so happy...

finished my pmi project this morning at 4am+

but totally tired to wake up at 6am... no choice, cant afford to skip tut tt's at 8am

y would any1 wants to hav lessons at 8am man??

dumb dumb sch... y so early... haiz nvm

so happy...

saw sc with another gal!!! wahahha... super duper happy

no wonder he hasnt really been bothering me lately... this is good news man

n... its actually weird to see her tagging him instead of the other way round...

but anyway, i shud be happy for him... n MYSELF!! wahahah

still, kinda felt like he followed me to the bus stop though...

wat happened was tt carmen accompanied me to the bus stop

n i saw him walking alone with some distance behind me

u noe me, my normal reaction is to hide of coz... hehe

he paced around the area where he lost sight of me... gosh...

it was scary. yes

later on, tt gal appeared beside him... so ya..

its actually odd to see him so many times in a day u noe

hav been playing pinkpanther throughout the day

but im still happy.. wahaha he's not bothering me!! wahahah


so happy...
coz if u think tt there'll be more ppl tt's gonna bother me even though i managed to shooh sc away
u r so wrong...
im putting more barriers to my male circle of frens
another words, no more male frens for me ! yeah
so u guys out there better feel honoured tt u guys r known as my frens k!
hahha... juz kidding
shall resume to tt solemn attitude towards guys =p

so happy...

my husband accompanied me to des chalet last night!

heehee.. she's so sweet.

she accompanied me even though she's tired... luv her lots

n des kept feeding us with lots of food... its really crazy lah...

very large portion u noe!!! he's really stuffing us man

nvm abt tt

he really did the bbqing for us..

so he's often at the bbq while we sat around the tv watching some chinese drama

hehe... evil... n we r really not paying anything to the chalet

really like a free-loader haha

when its almost 10pm, des didnt wanna let me go

he took my hp as his hostage... n if u ever notice... i cant go home without my hp n pouch

he dragged the time, ordering me to eat the last satay for the day

i dread coz too full... but had to do it for the sake of going home...

so ya... ate it n finally reached home at 11pm+

ya... tt is also 1 of the reason y i had to start doing my project late

n... of coz my bro wanna finish up his dota, had to wait till 12am+ juz to use the com

still, im happy i got free food for dinner without worrying so much coz my husband is there

woohoo... husband, u rockz! luv u lots

so happy...

dan called yesterday asking me " eh u wanna work or not?"

i was so tempted to say "i wanna quit" but it's not the right time to announce tt

so i replied " y? u wan me to quit ah?"... ok... a lil to the line of quitting part.. hehe

but becoz he called while i was having lec, kinda shooh him away

yup... n i reject working on fri sat n sun 6pm...

it's like wan me to die ah? still got other projects to work on man...

plus cca, plus beauty slp, plus band, plus family... cannot lah..

ppl got life 1 lo

so happy...

gerald came up with an idea to play dota with carmen wai n me on fri

i so wanna go!! i wanna try play play as a noob (i need my beauty slp too... wahuhuh...)
yay!! can play together

so hu's house shud we play in??

hmm... its a mystery

stay tune to find out... wahahaha

so happy!! new shirts

wahaha...

so happy!! my bro justin did some shopping for me

he got me 6 shirts!! yay!!

i got new shirts... yay!!

haha... in the end, didnt do project last night...

too tired n too happy with my new shirts

wahahhaha...

ok shall really chiong tonight =p

project fever

oh im so happy!!! wahahha..

im on the right track for my pmi project...

was rushing since last night till this morning juz hoping to finish it up

guess wat... worked on it since 12am to 5am

fantastic right?

guess wat?

teacher extended the dateline...

haiz... nvm... im glad he checked mine n told me mine shud be able to pass...

though he juz mentioned a pass, still, it's good...

going for des chalet later....

really hope my husband would come along

sigh... kinda doubt she will come coz of her project...

oh well... will be rushing pmi project again tonight.. this time, it shall be neater

yeah!! OOoooOOOsh!!!

school starting in a few hrs time... tired abt it...

had been working on my project till late...
suddenly feel life is kinda meaningless if this trend is going to keep its pace
think i m near to losing her...

dining...

well.. becoz i so dread to meet up
i was an hr late for it... hehe... typical me...
but sadly, i couldnt dine with my husband although we were all in the same area.. wahuhuh...
y did u finish ur dinner so early??
nvm then... ok..
so des n me head out to makan sutra for dinner...
i had no preference for the selection of food there..
so he took orders to get me eating...
we got stingray, hokkien mee, n oyster
wow... n we took like hrs to finish them..
its expected coz i really wasnt in a good appetite to eat anything
ya.. in the end... we were there for abt 1 n a half hr eating...
goodness
but we do tok though...
abt the food
abt his chinese restaurant n blah...
n complaining abt aranda

i understand tt he's trying to keep me reminded tt eating is important
n i noe its out of goodwill he's doing all this...
still.. im not sure abt his real reason for doing all this
wat i would like to think of it is juz pure frenship bonding
since we haven't seen each other for almost a month i think

help me... i dread this night

aiya aiya aiya....
i cant believe im posting this but i m
coz im so reluctant to go for dinner with des
n really dreading the time to pass...

u muz be wondering how did i end up in this situation...
well of coz, i always hav my husband to protect me right?
for every invitation from guys i would tell them to ask my husband
this also allows me to get permission from my husband...
as u noe... my husband noes me well, she noes i dun wanna meet guys for leisure purposes
n so... i did e same thing to des... told him to ask my husband
guess wat? my husband is not available to go for dinner...
of coz i told him if husband not going, im not going...
he kinda 'threatened' me with him coming to sengkang in search of my location...
stalker... so scary... wah...
so to be fair,
i let my husband to do e decision by asking a very simple fate question ' a or b'
a = no , b = yes
she chose b... wahuhuhuh... apparently my telepathy power not strong enough.. sigh
i've gotta keep to my words n go for dinner with des...
oh man... i dread.. so dread...

job -> TPCO -> calculation -> i cant accept

wow... didnt hav e habit to blog but i'll try
anyway, im once again considered "jobless"
need to find a job... gosh...
n i admit im not feeling healthy this month
symptoms occured again...
im having constant headaches
trying to maintain my weight
giving myself a lil more rest than usual
but im still bleeding...
in a sense losing blood extremely easily
i dun mean gals period lah...
its like im bleeding with juz a minor scratch n stuff
yes... i noe all those frens of mine hav been telling me to take care
yes... i do but wat's e real cause of it?
n i still dun think im stressed...
in fact, think im too relaxed
look look.. my 2 master piece!!!









alright... bored... in sch... after mi meeting
suppose to work on my pmi project but i think i'll do tt in awhiles time



i've been thinking abt wat my cello sectional teacher said to me last fri...
im not so afraid to meet him now since he kinda noe tt i didnt really like him
but... im sure he's pretty alert abt my tots in regards to cello
i've been thinking of quitting TPCO due to e mistreatments to the other members
didnt like e idea of not anouncing their decision to the whole orchestra or sectional
n obviously, im 1 of those tt was e last to noe all the info all members r suppose to noe
felt totally cut off from this CCA
but mr lim did make a point tt its not worth giving up cello due to e arrangments in the committee
ya.. especially to some1 hu's so interested in performing music
im sad.. sad tt i cant perform in the concert tt's coming up on 24th june juz becoz i didnt noe
its a voluntary concert as according to mr lim
well... shant waste my sch fees not learning a new instru right?
i will stay on!!!!
this time, i'll show them i can perform n i will perform



lil worry abt staying on..
hmm... not trying to boast or anything but...
e cellists in my batch r kinda slow in picking up cello
i noe i should be patient n go along with the grp
but im afraid they might affect my hearing n tempo rhythm
i really can't slack off with my music sense coz i need tt dumb dumb cert in order to teach next yr
it'll ruined my plan in life
i cant afford tt right?
plus... i need to rush my piano to meet up with the examination standards by end of july!!!
i havent even mastered or memorised my 3 pieces yet!!
gosh... i dunno if i can make it in time...
muz chiong!!!!! yes muz chiong



another thing mr lim mentioned...
hmm... he told me to try open up to relationship
haiz... u muz be thinking y is this teacher so kpo right?
well, dun ask me, i've met quite a lot of kpo ppl in tp. haha....
but should i?
now isnt e right time right?
hmmm....lets calculate...
1. studies to keep up
2. work to balance finance
3. church to commit my time
4. bros to keep me attitude and character in shape
5. music to rush my cert
not a very good timing isnt it?
its sad for those hu r on my tail lah haiz...



im going so broke this month...
nat n bert better appreciate it man...



i've also been thinking n even think abt it in my dreams...

i juz cant accept linxi being my fren's bf...

i juz cant with due respect to my fren, i respect ur decision but pardon me...

i juz cant accept...

there's juz so much u dunno n tt u claimed u noe everything tru him

its the same all over when it was with cally

n i noe nat didnt really wanna tell me abt this coming

im used to being e last to noe anyway... tts wat i wonder...

wats e importance of this frenship?

y is there a need to make a pact abt consulting every1's view before accepting a guy if u r not going to abide to it?

some pics of the band n song leader

the going-on 18yrs old band members + song leader





haha... e fun part of is music fever!!!





e trio





the indian pose... wanna add on?





awe...









juz lying and lazing around








ppl in white... kinda like PAP supporters heh? hehe... too bad i was in red



oh oh... n i forgot to post my tail!! haha... here u go

if u think this way...

well, if u think i'm bothered abt aranda for not assigning me days to work
then i gotta tell u they've got quite a good reason to do tt:
- they now noe im searching for another job, probably will think i've got negative impression on them
- i didnt ask for more working days nor did i tell them my schedule, so it's really difficult for them to schedule me
- im a female, according to their stereotype thinking, gals r not so productive as compared to guys
- it'll be wise for them not to make me work so much coz now they noe im weak
- it'll put them on safe guard if im not around to work coz i might be a wrong influence to the other workers...
- i create unnecessary trouble... u noe lah... ppl helping me n blah... in e end im not really working but ppl helping me to work. wow

so as a disadvantage to me:
- lower income of coz... n im getting poorer again...
- getting such a treatment does make me think a lil more abt working
- will miss working with all the other part-timers... im missing shirleen, yinsheng, yanxian, gerald, waihong, tall dan, stella, n not forgetting... my HUSBAND!!! wahuhuhuh...

wat benefits:
- obey my husband like taking more rest n eating more at home
- got more time to look for jobs!!
- no need to listen to orders from managers... wahahaha
- catch up with my old pals
- more time for things i wanna do
- time for projects n meetings
- prepare presents for june babies

where did it all go wrong?

i dun understand...
n im beginning to think I'll nv will...
i've tried my best to improve
but it all seems a fraud
wat is going on?
wat hav i become?

i hid my tears away
n pretended that im ok
but it hurts to see the world changing
leaving u behind with all tts remaining
is this how it shud be?
is this wat i hav to go tru?

i've lost my past
trying to live with the present
n dream the future
im racing with time
how long will i last?
how much more will i bare?

wat can be done?
is this going to break me?
how m i to live tru it?
where did it all go wrong?

its getting better i hope

so many things to think abt...
i was abt to forget the pain i've been feeling since the day of our glory fall
when some1 reminded me of the situation tt im still in
it got me thinking pretty much
but at least... now...
my eldest bro is doing his part to contribute
im still looking for a job tt wouldnt harm my body as bad
mother is babysitting once again..
yup... things had gotten quite comforting when u r not the onli 1 working
knowing tt there'll be wider income for this month
think we can still make it next month
so... did we improve?
im not sure... all i noe is tt we r trying our best to sustain
n my mum refuses to use my money...
she's hoping tt mine would be a back up for sch fees...
dunno if its alright to put it this way
think i'll still use it if its necessary ba...

im so motivated!!!

haha...
im still up n awake at 3am!!
cant believe it... hehe
aiya... gotta study for term test mah...
thx to a study call from some1... i managed to wake up
now i realise alarm clock is not enough if i were to plan on waking at midnight to study
ok.. good.. did some study today!!!
feel so contented... haha

n carmen!
ur advice is so motivating!!!
i'll strive harder to disallow wat the manager hopes to achieve
wahahha.. yesh! muz jia you!!!
thx a lot
no doubt it'll be tough to accept the fact tt i'll get bullied n blah
still, need to grow some thick skin in the society
hai!.. i mustn't be defeated juz like tt
u r so right!

still waiting n wondering...

im so bored in sch now...
was late for tutorial (eemac)
guess wat time i entered...
9.44 am
hahha... can u imagine?? okok... very bad i noe...
n ya noe i was onli in class for 11 mins n class dismiss...
sigh... wat a waste of my time eh?
should hav stayed at home to rot.


anway, u muz be asking y im so late right?
coz... i was bathing...
onli when im abt to leave then i found out my ez-link card isnt with me
so... panic lah... then remembered my bro took my card yesterday
so... called him n make immediate appointment to meet him after my sch ends
ya... he's working in commonwealth lah!!!
sigh... no choice but to save money
so... im travelling there juz to get my card from him...
how dumb right?
guess this r some moments things cock up with ur siblings...
its kinda irritating at times but gotta adapt to it... hehe


n wat m i doing now????
im slacking in the library waiting for somebody to entertain me
i wonder hu... my dream guy quick appear!!! haha..
ya... quick appear n spare me all tt trouble to find u
spare me the irritation of guys on my tail..
defend away the guys hu wanna get touchy with me n blah...
where? where? where r u??
haiya.... crapping lah


basically, juz typing a post to pass time
quite entertaining though... haha...
n gerald appeared when i was typing " my dream guy quick appear"
gave me a fright loh... i gave a short scream when i realised his presence in the library, standing juz beside me lah
gosh... hope he didnt read much...
it'll be so embarrasing... hahaha...


it's 11am now... so bored... another hr to go... sigh...

n yay!!! im going to the concert with carmen tonight!!! wahahahha...
so exciting!!!

its a symphony by vjc
concert's at 7.30pm tonight...
its $10 per ticket but i got it for free
hehe.. ya.. given by my cello teacher
hehe...